Posts Tagged ‘balls hitting’

Post-coital Tristesse — Word Count: 24,358

Bruce looked over at the clock on his nightstand. Elizabeth had been crying for the last 20 minutes. Awkward, he thought. I know I’m good, but she needs to calm the fuck down.

He closed his eyes and ran a hand over his face, trying to drown out the image of Elizabeth sobbing. He hoped the servants hadn’t heard her crying — it was perfectly fine that they had heard the moans of passion he had drawn from Elizabeth’s lips, but he had a reputation to uphold. And a crying bitch did nothing for his repuation.

“Do you do this every time?” he asked in a bored tone, staring up at the ceiling.

Elizabeth sniffled. “Y- yes,” she stammered. “I’m sorry, it’s just—”

“Yeah, not interested,” Bruce said coolly, sitting up and covering his enormous package with the bedsheet. “I just want to know if I can expect the same thing next time.” Enormous. Riiiiiiiiiiiight.

08

03 2011

Post-coital Tristesse — Word Count: 15,560

The sun burned into Todd’s pasty, flabby skin. Through his sunglasses, he could discreetly check out Ken’s perfectly sculpted abs as the two of them lounged on their towels.

It’s Elizabeth I love, it’s Elizabeth I love, it’s Elizabeth I love, Todd repeated to himself over and over. Everything I’m doing — spying on her through her windows at night, getting in shape so I can impress her by joining a recreational basketball league, helping Ken get over the pain of losing Olivia sometime in the late 1990s — everything I’m doing is to win back Elizabeth.

But it was getting more and more difficult to convince himself, especially when Ken was lying just inches away from him in nothing but a tiny red bathing suit. Hotness

14

11 2010

Post-coital Tristesse — Word Count: 8,450

Winston acted as if he hadn’t heard Bruce’s tirade. “Have you heard the new Droids album?” he asked.

“It’s pretty good,” Bruce admitted.

Winston laughed. “Talk about a joke!” he said. “Their earlier stuff was so much better.”

“They did hit their peak around 1995,” Bruce agreed.

Winston took a heavy drag on his cigarette. “1995? More like 1983,” he said, snorting.

“What’s your point, Egbert?” Bruce snarled, clearly annoyed.

Winston just shrugged.

“I don’t pay you to talk about the latest bullshit indie album,” Bruce snapped. “I pay you to fucking entertain.” Winston is totally cooler than you

09

11 2010

Prom Baby! – Word count: 20,277

Elizabeth’s jaw dropped.
“I know it’s a lot to ask,” Todd said quickly. “But you’re the only person at school who knows what’s really going on between me and Ken. And you’re a really special friend. It would mean so much to us if you would do it.”
“Todd, I’m really flattered, but I can’t,” Elizabeth said sincerely. “You know what, though? I’m sure Enid would be happy to help out.”
“Does that mean either Ken or I would have to stick our … in Enid?” Todd made a face. “Oh, no. God, no.” Enid is HAWT

14

11 2009

Sorry you didn't find what you were looking for!

I’d like to offer my sincerest apologies to the dude who searched for “double penetration do balls hit” and ended up here instead.

01

12 2007